A good repetition feels like a lift and a squeeze that comes from inside, low in the pelvis, closer to your back passage and the base of the penis than to your stomach. It should be possible to hold a conversation through it.
Why this comes first
The single most common reason a pelvic floor program does nothing is that the person doing it is squeezing their glutes, their inner thighs, or their abs, and feeling productive while the target muscle barely moves. You cannot see this muscle and you get almost no natural feedback from it, so "I definitely felt something" is not evidence that you found it.
Spend a few minutes on identification now. It is the highest-return five minutes in the whole program.
The two checks worth using
The mirror check. Stand undressed in front of a mirror. Try to lift and squeeze internally, as if you were stopping yourself from passing wind and drawing everything up and in at the same time. If you have the right muscles, you should see the base of the penis dip slightly inward and the scrotum lift. It is a small movement. Look for a subtle draw upward, not a dramatic one.
The perineum check. Rest your fingertips lightly on the perineum, the soft area between the scrotum and the anus. Try the same lift. You should feel the muscle move away from your fingers, upward and inward. If you feel your fingers being pushed outward instead, you are bearing down, which is the opposite of what you want. Stop, breathe out, and try again with less effort.
Both of these come from the same professional patient guidance the rest of our program is built on, including the Oxford University Hospitals NHS FT 2024 leaflet and North Bristol NHS Trust. Neither carries any risk, and both can be repeated as often as you like.
The stop-the-stream test: once, as a test only
You have probably heard that you can find these muscles by stopping your urine mid-flow. That is true as a one-time identification check, and it is the only thing it is good for.
Try it once, if you want to. Partway through a normal trip to the bathroom, try to slow or stop the flow without moving your legs or squeezing your buttocks. The muscle that does that is the one you are training.
Then never do it again as part of your training. North Bristol NHS Trust is direct about this: do not practice stopping the flow of urine midstream, as it may interfere with the normal process of emptying your bladder. The Oxford guidance says the same, that this is a test to identify the muscles and should not be performed repeatedly.
This is why the stop-the-stream test appears exactly once in KegelPro, during onboarding, and is never a session exercise. Repeating it is not a shortcut to faster progress. It is just a bad habit with a real downside.
What a correct contraction feels like
A good repetition feels like a lift and a squeeze that comes from inside, low in the pelvis, closer to your back passage and the base of the penis than to your stomach. It should be possible to hold a conversation through it.
Cues that keep you honest, taken straight from the standard NHS technique warnings:
- Do not hold your breath. Breathe normally the whole way through.
- Do not clench your buttocks. Put a hand on one if you are unsure.
- Do not squeeze your legs together.
- Do not suck in your stomach. A light tightening low in the abdomen is normal and expected. A hard brace is not.
- Do not push down or strain. If in doubt, use less effort, not more.
And the most underrated cue of all: after every repetition, let go completely. If you cannot feel a distinct release between reps, you are fatiguing, and the set is over.
If you cannot find it
Some men genuinely cannot locate the contraction from written cues, and that is not a character flaw or a sign that something is wrong. It is a skill problem, and a pelvic health physiotherapist can solve it in one appointment with feedback you cannot get from a phone.
Try the checks lying down first, which is the easiest position to isolate the muscle without substituting. Try after a shower when you are relaxed. Try with less force. If it still is not clear after a week or so of trying, get an assessment rather than training something you have not found.
When to talk to a professional
Book an appointment with your doctor or a pelvic health physiotherapist if you are not sure you are contracting the right muscles even after these self-checks, if you have any pain in the pelvis, genitals, perineum or rectum, if you have difficulty starting urination or a weak stream, or if you have leakage of urine or stool that bothers you. Pelvic floor training should never be painful.